Monday, May 20, 2013
Looking for community
I love writing, blogging and connecting. Black & Gray is my return to the blogosphere. This time though, there is yearning, an undeniable need to slow down, to breathe, to stop incessantly doing and simply be.
In my twenties, I was driven by one passion or another. I didn't plan and cultivate; I gave into whatever moved me at the moment. I simply rode the wave. Today, at almost fifty, I don't have the energy nor spontaneity, I had in my thirties. I no longer want to change the world in ways I dreamed in my forties. With every project, community and cause I took on, I was full-throttle. Always have been pretty intense. Some closest to me have told me I'm like a pit-bull. Once I get something in my jaw, there's no letting go. Before you take offense, the truth is it's an accurate description- or it was until now.
In my former blogging life, I loved being an online admin, publisher, editor and community leader, but I don't want any of those roles today. While I was humbled and grateful to all the writers who thanked me for supporting them and promoting their work, I can't do that today. For all the readers and community members who graciously took the time to say they appreciated my reviews and giveaways and gifts, I can't give like that today. And as deeply as I feel about women issues and world affairs, I can't lead any more campaigns. Three years ago, I lost someone I loved and that loss led to me walking away from a passionate, but consuming blogging life. Today, I want to balance my worlds.
Has there been a time in your life when you felt what had been working for you no longer was? Have you ever felt overwhelmed by your blogging life? If you can relate to a desire to slow down or had an experience that had you re-examing what consumed your days, can you share a little wisdom or experience? Don't want this to be a downer so please free to inject some levity.
Today, I want to be led and held and reminded it's okay to follow. Can you squeeze my hand just before I leap?
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