Beast at the water cooler
It's Tuesday, people. Confession Time. You know I feel a bit embarrassed as I begin this blog because in writing this it's occurred to me there might be a pattern here I thought I had worn down, smoothed over. Seriously, I was convinced I was mellowing with age. I don't anger easily and certainly less often. I ignore bullshyte and all manner of stupidity that has nothing to do with me. Generally, I'm in a good mood until recently when a co-worker laughed at my expense one time too many.
Granted I can be naive, out-of-the-loop sometimes, (honestly most of the office chatter is hubris ) so when a hot topic of the day comes up, I'm clueless. I usually don't mind when the up-and-coming are spouting off. That is until yesterday.
20-something, super rep has a habit commenting about me as if I'm not there. I typically ignore her because the ageist I am, could care less what she finds amusing, irritating or inconvenient (“What's that smell?” My lunch and you know it). Yesterday, something snapped and I felt my prickly scales spike and tingle. I wanted to reach out and swipe my paw across the aspiring Employee of the Month's cheek, drawing blood with the strike.
Yeah, I'm too old to for this kind of reaction. Whatever! that's what I felt, and it's Confession Tuesday so judge me if you want to. Maybe it was the frigid cold that made me so frothy. Maybe, it was reality of spending the new year, another year in a gray cubicle that was the true source of my agitation.
At the moment, I'm home in front of my lovely, mammoth screen, clicking away. I'm the odd chick out, who finds the sound of keystrokes soothing.
Generally I am laid back, I try not to take myself too seriously, I tend to be pretty neutral in regards to others and I am not really into the whole drama thing but sometimes a person comes a long that actually does get under my skin. I might manage okay for a little while but it is like rubbing dry twigs together eventually all that friction results in a fire. I sometimes even snap. It is hard when it is a situation you can't avoid and when time-outs aren't an option.
ReplyDeleteha. not a huge fan of snipers...esp those that just want to tear people down...
ReplyDeleteor do it to reach their own goal...or because they are mean and sadistic...
so its an all too familiar feeling...smiles...
Sometimes women like her just get on one's nerves, like a yappy little dog that is allowed to run loose. There must be something about you that gets to her, or she wouldn't pay attention to you. Something you embody that she dislikes in herself, or something you possess that she knows she doesn't. Maybe only by pointing out other's flaws can she elevate her silly self. Best to ignore her, of course, but a little smackdown is what mama cat does with out of line kittens, and sometimes catty humans need a dose of the same.
ReplyDeleteI'm old enough to be her mother. Is that permission? :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, yes it is. :) Although she'd likely whine to HR and who needs that. Too bad practical jokes are so frowned on these days. Then again, they say revenge is a dish best served cold... so you could plan, and wait, like a (pick your favorite predator) patiently stalking her prey. ~
DeleteHaha! You probably have mellowed, but we all have a limit to the amount of crap we take before something blows :) Thankfully, my co-workers are generally okay (and I can mostly avoid the ones who aren't.) But I've had jobs where I had to work with the uppity, gossipy ones. Ugh! Don't mind being the odd one out in those groups, that's for sure.
ReplyDeleteAh, I'm over it. I don't stay angry long. Besides you all gave me a. Good laugh. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteSo glad to have found you via Trifecta - Great post and terrific blog. And as I tell my children, it'll come back to bite her in the a$$.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kelly.
ReplyDeletelol I found the key clicks soothing as well. These days it saves my sanity. And as a mid-lifer (going on 51!) I can relate. Or can't as luckily I only have my 8 and 10 year olds to contend with, not 20-somethings.
ReplyDeleteGlad you're past your "water cooler beast" moment, but I understand. I have good coworkers, but every now and then I too have to fight the urge to say something I know I'll regret... makes you human.
ReplyDeleteI quite often find my own thoughts more comforting than the mindless chit-chat of those aspiring for positions of importance that are of no importance at all to me. It is not that my own thoughts are so special it is just that their thoughts are so banal and tedious and mind-numbingly pointless and irritating that I just want to bag my head with a hammer! So, I hear ya, LaTonya. Tap those keys. :)
ReplyDeleteBeing naive is a good thing as I am one too ;) No one is judging you here sweety you are brave enough to confess things you think are your mistakes. That wasn't one but still, cheers to being brave :)
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on the ability to tune thjngs out and skip the bullshyte (love this spelling) but sometimes we are pushed too far. I've become more solitary as I've grown older and I find comfort in the peace and quiet (after years of chaos raising the banshees). I totally get this feeling!
ReplyDeleteLaTonya, I could relate to this piece so much. The older I get the more I seem to be reaching for my claws. Instead of mellowing out I feel like I don't have patience for the crap anymore.
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to tell you how glad I am you found Trifecta, and how much I love what comes from your sessions of soothing key tapping. I hope 2014 is a stellar year for you, my friend-and I too look forward to visiting often:) Hugs!!
Oh man, I must say I am usually the opposite of you - everything gets under my skin! I wish it didn't, but alas, it does. Perhaps that shall be my resolution next year? Grow thicker skin? Still, reading this sentence, "I wanted to reach out and swipe my paw across the aspiring Employee of the Month's cheek, drawing blood" made me feel the sweet tingle of just rage as I imagined this playing out (I'm not insane, I promise - not really). I'm glad you are over it, but oh that was a satisfying image!
ReplyDeleteLove the last line.
ReplyDeleteAppreciate your confession - suddenly I'm feeling much less odd woman out : )
This office crapola goes on everywhere there are more than two people working together. With hindsight, I can see that almost every time I've been sent over the edge by an obnoxious coworker, it had much more to do with my own insatisfactions/frustrations/insecurities than with the obnoxiousness, which tends to be constant. So my unsolicited advice to you is, after you've cooled down, take a look at what's really under your skin.
Also, I'm loving the cold revenge advice as well. May borrow.
Kym, I did calm down and conceded the underlying frustration was likely deeper than her behavior. After writing the post, I felt better and at work, I reverted to putting on my headset. :-)
DeleteWe all get tired of the bullcrap once we've reached a certain age--and occasionally we've had enough. I have this visualization trick that helps me when I find myself ready to snap at people at work: I picture the hand of God coming down out of the clouds to smack whoever has annoyed me right upside the head. Sort of a Monty Python thing, but it usually makes me giggle, and that always keeps people guessing.
ReplyDeleteAh, the sweet sound and feeling of fingers on a keyboard in your own space with no annoying coworkers around. Great post - made me thankful that I work for and with myself. There are days I miss office mates and co-workers, but more often than not I don't at all.
ReplyDeleteAw, this was a really quality post. In theory Id like to write like this too taking time and real effort to make a good article but what can I say I procrastinate alot and never seem to get something done.
ReplyDeletejeux concours
the nerve of some people...and yes, claws or at least thoughts of the claws coming out on some nasty moments have crossed my path as well. really love your offering. all the best in 2014. ☺
ReplyDeleteSometimes it's difficult keeping your cool all the time. And listening to the drip drip drip of those that take pleasure in sniping, getting under your skin - then you just gotta explode - you just have too. (I do - but it takes me years to get there...)
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]
People can be such jerks, and if all you've got for a confession is that you THOUGHT bad things? You're way, way ahead of the game. Thanks for linking up. We love seeing you in our linkz.
ReplyDeleteYou guys rock. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteOne reason the young ones make you snap is you know their B S is based on a total lack of knowing. Social Climbers just like the power grab and I have known my share. I hope you can find that sweet spot of indifference. All that glitters is not gold.
ReplyDelete