Labels

Compatible



He was a suit, clean-shaven,
Penn educated, member of the
brotherhood for life. He was squarely
upper-middle class & moving up
the social strata.

She was Bohemian mama,
brown sugar & bacon, community
college stock & proud of it.
She was headed towards a life of action
committees & town meetings.

 They crossed paths at the university
coffeehouse where the intellectual & activist
coolly acknowledged each other’s value.

 She was cute and he was single.
She warm like biscuits & he was
lean like hungry ambition.

Brief exchange and so they found
their common taste: coffee black,
uncomplicated so unlike the rest
of their lives. They were compatible.










Anna asked us to create mood or atmosphere. As I shared at the pub, I rely heavily on sound devices. Internal, easy rhythm. Please let me know if I got it right and how you might tweak or let me know if you have questions. Critiuqe welcome. Join us here.


Theme is appetite. Join us.
Labels:

Comments

  1. Kerry O'ConnorJuly 4, 2013 at 10:58 AM

    You have the knack of telling a story, and letting the characters grow out of the detailed descriptions. I surely hope this one has a happy ending.

    ReplyDelete
  2. LaTonya BaldwinJuly 4, 2013 at 11:02 AM

    So far it's been quite happy. Honestly, Kerry, I write what I know. I know very little. I love food, love being in love. That's how this started.

    Thanks for taking time to hang out with me. I love your company.

    ReplyDelete
  3. FireblossomJuly 4, 2013 at 11:11 AM

    I can see it, you put your reader right there. Welocome to Toads, by the way!

    ReplyDelete
  4. LaTonya BaldwinJuly 4, 2013 at 11:13 AM

    Thank you, Shay.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Marcoantonio Arellano (Nene)July 4, 2013 at 11:37 AM

    This was nice. Simple and sweet with a pragmatic message

    Gracias

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sherry Blue SkyJuly 4, 2013 at 1:22 PM

    I love this story!

    ReplyDelete
  7. grapelingJuly 4, 2013 at 2:30 PM

    you smooth the two lines of the "V" down to the single point: compatible.

    ReplyDelete
  8. UnknownJuly 4, 2013 at 2:38 PM

    I love a good romantic story!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Brian MillerJuly 4, 2013 at 5:35 PM

    smiles...i like your use of food...ha...brown sugar and bacon...

    love...She warm like biscuits & he was lean like hungry ambition.

    and coffee makes breakfast...
    and uncomplicated is all the better...

    ReplyDelete
  10. Brian MillerJuly 4, 2013 at 5:43 PM

    found your comment at dverse as well...caught in the filter for some reason....replied to you as well..

    ReplyDelete
  11. LaTonya BaldwinJuly 4, 2013 at 5:49 PM

    Thanks,

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousJuly 4, 2013 at 6:28 PM

    Lush! Love this especially:
    "She warm like biscuits & he was
    lean like hungry ambition. "

    Tasty!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Mystic_MomJuly 4, 2013 at 6:52 PM

    It had to be coffee! Perfect!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Susie ClevengerJuly 4, 2013 at 7:26 PM

    Great romantic piece. Love the use of food...opposites do attract. :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. MaryJuly 4, 2013 at 7:51 PM

    Oftentimes the external things don't matter as much as who the people are inside. I am sure these two were very happy.

    And an APPETITE for coffee doesn't hurt. I enjoyed your write, LaTonya.

    ReplyDelete
  16. rallentandaJuly 4, 2013 at 9:07 PM

    Absolutely lovely .Warm, charming natural and I'm glad it's not fiction!

    ReplyDelete
  17. GraceJuly 4, 2013 at 9:26 PM

    Like the weaving of their story and finding a common ground, black coffee it is ~ It works for me ~

    ReplyDelete
  18. Ann (bunnygirl)July 4, 2013 at 10:03 PM

    My husband and I are from very different backgrounds, so I could really relate!

    ReplyDelete
  19. brudbergJuly 5, 2013 at 1:03 AM

    A nice smooth rhythm and a nice romantic story, the food also working as a metaphor creates a nice mood. And finding compatibility in the simplicity of black coffee. I enjoyed this

    ReplyDelete
  20. AnonymousJuly 5, 2013 at 6:28 AM

    It is nice when we can come together in a nice blend!

    ReplyDelete
  21. ClaudiaJuly 5, 2013 at 12:03 PM

    coffee black...and she warm like biscuits...i think nothing can go wrong... loved it...

    ReplyDelete
  22. UnknownJuly 5, 2013 at 5:29 PM

    The brisk, apt characterization works very well to reinforce the sense of everything fitting into place. The compatibility and no nonsense tone of each, ambitious in their own way, helps to establish the common ground you build at the end (sorry for the unintended pun). The alliteration also ties things up neatly, engagingly. Punctuation functions like a staccato beat throughout the work. Wonderful use of your poetic tools to create atmosphere!

    ReplyDelete
  23. UnknownJuly 5, 2013 at 7:19 PM

    This is a great slice of life - lots of elements for a great story - two antiheros and an unlike match that sound like a blast.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Rosemary Nissen-WadeJuly 5, 2013 at 7:42 PM

    Delightful!

    And yay for black coffee! In that respect, I am compatible too. :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. kelvin s.m.July 6, 2013 at 7:45 AM

    ...really nice La Tonya... i like the consistency in your manner of describing your main elements here... i like also that you alot independent verses to maximize & emphasize the character you set for each of your elements... having said that, i think i am quite uncomfortable with your 'cute' word choice... for me not a good choice to pair with the rest of your wonderful wordings... i dunno, maybe it was just me... i loved the 'like hungry ambition..' perfect pairing of words there... smiles...

    ReplyDelete
  26. LaTonya BaldwinJuly 6, 2013 at 7:57 AM

    Kelvin, It's(cute) part of the way I envision their language. The cute and single line is meant to be shallow. It suggests how casually we intially size each other up especially if we're simply thinking in the moment in a good time way.

    That said open to suggestion. Very much appreciate your thoughtful and honest observations.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

This is an interactive site. Dialogue is the aim here. latonya.blackandgray(at)gmail (dot)com

Popular Posts