Friday, July 19, 2013

Without Applause


Below her, a ring of men form her stage. Around her, waves of blue lull her.
On cue, she spreads her arms, steps off headlong to meet the water, her final curtain call.










3 words: ring, water, stage
Word count: 33
Trifextra #77
Join us. 

15 comments:

  1. How sad! This was very intense.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sad, but she not others took control of her final moments. There is triumpht in that. Thanks for weighing in.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I like this! Very strong piece. Your response to TMW gives it even more impact. Her ending is sad yet triumphant.

    ReplyDelete
  4. agree on the intense...you def open the door in just 2 lines...wonder what drove her to that point...i wanna know the back story...ha...ah there is always so much more than what we see...id it worth regaining control to lose it all...that is a tough question...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ah, but the rules gave me 33 words, B. Who knows, I might fill it out but I'm a fan of short and micro fiction so it won't be lengthy even if fleshed out.

      Delete
  5. A lot going on in so few words. Great job.

    ReplyDelete
  6. LaTonya, I admire your consistent ability to write complex scenes using such perfectly chosen, sparse language. Sad moment, beautifully told.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Credit to a professor who stressed the importance of the right details, economy and the most mileage for word choices. Thank you.

      Delete
  7. I love that she soars in her final moments. Your professor sounds like a good one too-she or he taught you well, and it sums up my writing style too:)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Whoever your professor was, she led and inspired you well. The components you've noted are now noted on a piece of paper on my table, and will shortly be on the inspiration board beside me. Thank you, LaTonya :)))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Jo-Anne. Dr. Rashid was an amazing mentor.

      Delete
  9. I should never read the comments before I leave me own, because I inevitably end up finding one that I wish I'd made--in this case Jo-Anne's. She's nailed it. Your word choices, phrasing, sense of mood and rhythm, and the depth and power of your writing are remarkable. I'm not sure I agree that this is entirely sad, though. As you note above, there is something triumphant in this final act of control, and to me, the spreading of arms connotes an embracing of her choice, of what's to come.

    Okay, now I feel kind of silly writing a comment that's longer than your post...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow, Kallan, I am humbled and tearing up, here. I'm not sure my writing deserves this level of praise but I can't thank you enough. This is the kind of commment that let's a writer know, yes, you can actually write. Thank you.

      Delete

This is an interactive site. Dialogue is the aim here. latonya.blackandgray(at)gmail (dot)com

Thank you

Thank you
I know what I think. I write to hear what you think. Let's talk about it.